The 'Honeymoon' phase usually comes after a physical, emotional, or sexual assault on the victim. The abuser may feel remorseful for the explosion and shower the victim with attention, promises, or gifts. Many abusers say things like:
- I'll never do it again I'm sorry, and I never meant to hurt you
- I promise I will change
- I promise I'll get help
- I only did it because I was high/drunk/lost my temper
These phases tend to repeat over time and there may be days, weeks, months, or even years between episodes. As the cycle of violence escalates, the period between the phases often becomes shorter and shorter. This explains how the three dynamics of love, hope and fear keep the cycle in motion and make it hard for a victim to end a violent relationship. Often, the longer the relationship lasts, the faster the cycle will turn - and the worse the abuse gets during the explosion /violence phase.